Face tattoos and tā moko ain't a free pass

Don’t cry when you’re denied entry, bro

If you think getting a facial tattoo gives you some sort of untouchable street cred, think again. Walking into a pub, club, or any establishment expecting special treatment because of a few lines of ink on your face is laughable. Many people around the world see facial tattoos as intimidating at best, and at worst, an automatic warning sign of gang affiliation or trouble. To be honest, I simply look at them and think, “What an idiot - why would anyone ruin their face like that?”

A recent example makes this painfully clear. Brian Gardiner, a man with a face covered in what he insists is a meaningful tā moko tattoo, was denied entry to a pub in Australia. He reckons his tā moko tattoo symbolised ancestors who served in the military. Looking at the thing, it’s hard to see anything other than a chaotic mess of ink - more reminiscent of John Wayne Gacy’s clown face than a tribute to military service. The symbolism he claims is buried under a pile of scribbles that no one outside his own mind could decipher.

No one outside your Facebook feed gives a damn about your ancestors or whether you think the tattoo represents an eagle, a shark, or some mystical creature only you can identify. People aren’t trying to disrespect your heritage, they’re reacting to the reality of your choices. Facial tattoos carry an undeniable stigma, and walking into an establishment expecting them to be ignored is just plain naive.

Gardiner, of course, argued with security staff and the manager, insisting he would escalate the matter. Ultimately, he left empty-handed, looking like the fool he made himself out to be. The staff didn’t care. The rules exist for a reason: safety, comfort, and public perception. They aren’t there to accommodate someone’s questionable life choices.

His facial tā moko supposedly includes ancestral symbols like a hawk and shark, and references military service - but to me, it just looks like a jumble of scribbles.

If you choose to get a design that looks like a clown, a jumbled mess, or something no normal person can read, don’t be surprised when establishments enforce their policies and refuse entry. Personal expression is fine, but don’t expect society to rewrite its rules to accommodate your poor life decisions. The moment you put permanent ink on your face, you take on the consequences, and whining about it afterwards only makes you look even more ridiculous.

Facial tattoos and tā moko are not a free pass. They’re a life choice with social consequences. Own it, or be prepared to face rejection - without anyone shedding a single tear for your “symbolism.”